1. Home
  2. /
  3. Relationship
  4. /
  5. I Don’t Like Kissing My Boyfriend: What To Do?

I Don’t Like Kissing My Boyfriend: What To Do?

Sophie Simons
February 20, 2024

What does it mean that I don’t like kissing my boyfriend?

Do you feel like pulling away whenever your boyfriend tries to kiss you? You are in turmoil because, in your mind, a romantic relationship blossoms over this intimate component. Your dilemma is justified and you should be asking this particular question to yourself.

What does it mean that I don’t like kissing my boyfriend?” The answer could come anywhere from grave reasons to your natural tendency.  We cannot discredit the importance of kissing in a romantic relationship. It gives a boost to the shared connectivity and accelerates the feelings of affection.

Kissing releases hormones in our bodies and makes us feel a surge of happiness and warmth. For most people, it is a feel-good thing. If you don’t like kissing your boyfriend, it could be because of several reasons. You need to sit down and think over why you don’t like kissing your boyfriend.

Disliking kissing is a normal phenomenon, and it does not necessarily mean there is something wrong with you. You might want to explore your feelings for your boyfriend. Is kissing the only thing that turns you off, and other ways of love-making generate the swirl of electricity in the pit of your stomach?

Have you ever enjoyed kissing with your previous partners? Did kissing excite you at the start of your relationship?

Is it common to not want to kiss your boyfriend?

It might come as a surprise, but it is fairly common not to want to kiss your partner. Some couples stay away from the simple act of kissing, but their relationship is just as romantic as a relationship that has profuse kissing. It all depends on personal preferences.

Psychology stresses on kissing a lot to deepen romantic bonds, which is quite true. But people have different opinions on this aspect. Not everyone likes kissing, that is for sure. Surprisingly, some cultures do not carry any evidence of romantic kissing and stay away from it.  

So, if you don’t like kissing your boyfriend, be at ease; you are not eerie at all! 

7 Reasons why you don’t like kissing your boyfriend

There could be some potential reasons fueling your aversion to kissing.

1. You had a previous bad experience

A bad kiss stays with you for a long time, especially if it has been traumatic. Kissing works with reciprocity and requires the willingness and interest of both partners. Some people disregard the comfort of others and take an intense approach that freaks the person out. At the same time, some are naturally bad kissers and have the worst kind of oral hygiene!  

2. You are grossed out by kissing

A French kiss involves a play with the mouth and the tongue. Some people are completely grossed out by the prospect of saliva. You could detest kissing because you are anxious about getting the germs

3. You have a fear of kissing

Philemaphobia is a fear of kissing. This phobia has some triggers and can jeopardize your romantic relationship if not addressed. 

4. Your partner is a bad kisser

A preeminent reason could be your partner’s disastrous kissing. Their kissing makes you feel preposterous and repulsed instead of giving you butterflies. 

5. The spark of kissing has died down with time

Maybe you had loved kissing your partner when your relationship was in full swing. As a relationship journeys down the road, the excitement and thrill of kissing wanes out. You find it tiring and mundane. 

6. Your partner’s hygiene is an issue

Females are usually obsessed with good hygiene, while men don’t give it much thought. You could be repulsed with your partner’s kissing because their oral hygiene is questionable. Their bad breath makes you want to puke, or you loathe the smell and taste of smoking. 

7. You prefer other intimate acts over kissing

It all narrows down to preferences. Other acts of intimacy like cuddling and caressing entice you more than kissing. Your partner could be more about kissing and not care about your preferences. This frustrates you! 

5 Things to do if you don’t like kissing your boyfriend

Kissing is a very personal and tantalizing act for some people. If you squirm away from your partner without communicating your heart and ironing out the problem, it will sabotage your relationship in the long run. The wise thing would be to face the music.

1. Be open about your concerns

There is nothing that can not be solved with communication. Share your issues about kissing with your partner and make them understand you. If their bad kissing is a problem, ask them to work on it while supporting them. 

2. Explore other intimate acts

You can make up for your lack of kissing with other intimate acts. Making your partner feel loved and keeping the passion alive is important. Try caressing their face, kissing their eyes, and locking gazes with them. 

3. Bring your partner on the same wavelength

If your partner does not understand you and is not in agreement with your wishes, there could be frequent fights and problems. You need to bring your boyfriend in agreement with you.

4. Hug and cuddle more

Hugging and cuddling release the same set of warm hormones that kissing does. The feelings of euphoria and pleasure can be stimulated by cuddling. Make sure you cuddle and hug your partner more. 

5. Strengthen emotional intimacy

Emotional intimacy makes up for the lack of physical intimacy. It has the potency of an elixir that keeps romantic relationships alive and brimming with chemistry and bonding. 

Can you still be in a relationship without kissing your boyfriend?

It should be a pretty absurd question to bring up, but the truth is such absurdity does take ground in the hearts. Detestation towards kissing could be a common concern for some individuals, which could make them question their normalcy or the authenticity of their feelings.

Rest assured, if you are ready to give your aversion to kissing a genuine thought and want to thrive with your partner without kissing your relationship is not in any jeopardy. You are just as much in a relationship as a couple that are intense kissers. 


Kissing is not the basis or a prerequisite of a relationship. What matters is the love, care, commitment, and respect that is shared between two individuals. As long as you have this, you are safe and sound!

Share this:
Sophie Simons

Sophie Simons

Sophie Simons is a leading psychologist with a passion for enriching relationships. Through empathetic counseling and insightful guidance, she empowers couples and individuals to foster deeper connections, resolve conflicts, and create lasting harmony. Sophie's expertise in relationship advice has touched countless lives, making her a trusted source for building fulfilling partnerships.

Love Starts Here

Connect with a therapist for convenient, ongoing support and progress step-by-step. 

Get Started
Love Advice
Dating, Relationship and Marriage Advice That Works

Join Our Newsletter

Please enable JavaScript in your browser to complete this form.
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram