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I’m in Love With My Best Friend: What Do I Do?

Irina Tracy
December 12, 2023

Love is not something we can control, and at times, it appears in less-than-desirable circumstances. One of the most confusing feelings is being in love with your best friend. It is something that takes time to realize and identify as being a romantic type of love and comes with a lot of things to consider. 

If you feel that you are in love with your best friend, there are a few things you can do to manage this situation. 

Identify what you feel and why 

The first thing you need to do is get to know your feelings. Are you indeed in love with them, or are you mistaking a perfect friendship for love? Your bestie is the person you share everything with, your partner in times of need, and your cheerier in times of joy. They know all your secrets, qualities, and flaws. And they are the ones to share both good and bad news with. All this could be taken as love even when it is not. 

You might think that you are in love with your best friend if you feel lonely or if there is a void in your romantic life. Maybe your current relationship turned toxic, and you need to end it. Your best friend ended a relationship recently, and you two became closer as a result of that. You need to find answers to such questions so you can identify your emotions for what they actually are. 

If you notice that you want to have romantic experiences with your best friend, it might be love, but it also might be just plain chemistry. Give it some time to introspect how you feel. If it is just a physical attraction, it will disappear shortly. If it is something more profound, chances are that you will be compelled to do something about it, as it won’t just go away. 

Assess the risks, whether you tell them or not.

Once you know how you feel, you want to look at the consequences of your feelings. At risk, here is a significant connection in your life: your best friendship! You are taking the same risks even if you don’t open up about your true feelings.

If you open up about your feelings, you take the risk of them not feeling the same and ending the relationship excruciatingly and abruptly. And even if they share your feelings, you have yet to determine if your bond will resist this type of transition. A romantic relationship is more complex and holds a lot more sensitivity than a friendship. The rules change, and so do the expectations. Also, if you ever break up, you can’t count on the fact that you will be able to go back to the best friend bond you used to have. 

Try to identify if they share your feelings.

Before you take any action regarding your feelings, try to see if your best friend shows signs of sharing your love. Since you are the closest peer to your best friend, you will quickly notice any peculiar changes in their behavior and attitude. Maybe they look at you differently, or they suggest hangouts with a hue of romantic vibe. 

If they romantically like you, they will show signs of flirting with you, even if in a subtle manner. Try to tell them that you have some romantic feelings towards a new person that captured your attention and check out their reaction closely. If they show signs of jealousy, this can be a sign that they are into you romantically. On the other hand, if they encourage you and support you in pursuing your new romance with someone else, their feelings toward you might be pure friendship. 

It will not always be easy to read these signs as your best friend might have the same fears as you, so they might become very good at hiding their emotions.  But you can’t skip this step if you are looking for clues on where they stand emotionally regarding your bond.

Identifying these signs will make your situation a lot easier. If you have reasons to believe they love you, too, you will feel more confident about sharing your feelings and taking your relationship to a new level. Consequently, if they don’t show signs of reciprocity, you have the perfect occasion to question your emotions and save your friendship rather than putting it at risk. 

Open up about your feelings. 

Talking to your best friend about the way you feel is one of the most challenging things you will have to do. There is one thing you want to keep in mind as you do that: prioritizing your friendship! You want to approach this without any shocking gestures. Please don’t set up a romantic scene that is bigger than they can handle, in case they don’t feel the same. Stay away from impressive gifts that are out of the ordinary for your friendship relationship, too. 

Try to discuss your feelings in a quiet place where you two can open up to each other. Be honest and assure them that you put a lot of thought into that conversation. It might be challenging to find the answer you were looking for fast because such matters are delicate, and they need to be processed in time.

But at the end of the day, there is no other way to find out how they feel about you other than asking. And even if they feel the same, both of you will have a lot to adjust to if you want to have a romantic relationship that also incorporates your profound friendship.


Falling in love with your best friend can be one of the most challenging emotions you will ever experience. But you deserve a chance at true happiness, and you can’t miss it. Have an open conversation about the emotional aspect of your friendship and see if there’s a divine plan at play!

If you two are meant to be soulmates, you will be on the same page emotionally. And if it is not a bond written in the stars, you might want to know that before investing even more in this type of romantic fantasy. Either way, open communication and emotional maturity are required to save your friendship. 

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Irina Tracy

Irina Tracy

As a lifestyle journalist, certified astrologer, and published author, I write about everything that makes my heart beat faster. After taking my degree in journalism and astrology, I decided to delve deeper into the subjects that appeal to me and published several books worldwide—looking forward to exploring exciting topics and mystical aspects of life one article after another.

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