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9 Key Signs Your Partner Is Not Supportive

Sophie Simons
February 20, 2024

It does not matter whether it is a fling or a serious relationship; the essentials need to be taken care of before getting into any relationship. Teenagers and even adults overlook the big picture and jump the gun. Love and infatuation are indubitably magnets that pull with a herculean force and make the mind hazy.

Long after getting your share of unfortunate incidents, you realize you do not fit right in with your partner. 

Top Signs Your Partner Isn’t Supportive

What if you happen to get involved with someone, and over time, some things start changing inside of you? You are unable to put your finger exactly on the crux, but you feel your heart tiring out. A stifling energy starts consuming you, and even though you are still in love with your partner, you realize there is something very wrong in your relationship.

Your messed up feelings could be a result of an unsupportive partner. Breaking it down to simplicity, we are going to enlist the top signs of an unsupportive partner. 

1. They are uninterested in your goals and aspirations

A genuine relationship has shared interests. Even if your partner’s passions do not align with yours, they should cheer on you and take an interest in your endeavors. Two people in a relationship share a life, and it is only fair for your interests and endeavors to float your partner’s boat, too.

If your partner cares the least about your dreams and pursuits, if your excitement for a particular goal does not tickle their fancy, and if they fake happiness, this is a sign of having an unsupportive partner. 

2. They trivialize your plight

When you are in a pickle or on the skids, they belittle your suffering instead of greasing your wheels. They act contemptuously for you and are bent over gaslighting your plight. Everything about you becomes about them, and you hear phrases like, “I told you you would lose.” or “Why are you such a weakling?” or “Stop complaining about your problems.” They criticize and insult you. 

3. They do not celebrate your achievements

A person who genuinely loves you will always find comfort and happiness in your success. Your partner should be your biggest cheerleader. Your success should swell their heart with pride and make them feel over the moon. They should be gloating over your success.

If you love your partner, you will feel pride and joy in their achievements. Your partner does not celebrate your wins and does not portray any feelings of happiness and pride. They make your achievements look insignificant.

Sometimes, when you succeed in your career or at your job, you witness their vexation. They cover it up by saying, “Work is hectic.” “I am just under the weather.” “I had a rough day.” If you are living through this sign, you are not overthinking. Your partner is antagonizing you, and they don’t want you to fly higher than them. 

4. They are not a good listener

A good partner needs to be a good listener. If they won’t lend an ear to our ranting, who would? Your partner is least interested to know what is going on in your life. When you talk to them about anything, they appear disinterested or talk over you. They are not good at active listening and always steer the wheels of a conversation towards themselves. 

5. Your losses do not influence them

When we encounter any loss, the first thing we do is turn to the most important person in our lives. Let’s suppose you come back from work dejected and battered because you did not get the promotion, you have failed your goal, or you had a financial loss.

Either your partner is not available to you, or they are indifferent and coldly say words of comfort. You feel their curtness and the deceitfulness of those words or actions. They often remind you of their foresightedness related to your failure, “I knew you would fail!” 

Your partner is unsupportive if your loss does not strike them and they are too engrossed in their own life to cater to your hurt. 

6. They are more involved with their success

The ladder of success is the only thing visible to your partner. Their passion for their career and achievements has blinded them to a point where they have sidelined you. You have been pushed into the back, and your life is not a concerning matter for them.

Everything in your relationship revolves around their life and their success. Sometimes, you stop and think if your existence and dreams even matter to them. 

7. They do not motivate you or laud you

A supportive partner will always be with you as your guiding light. They pump up your spirit and push you towards success. From little things to the biggest ones, they will be pulling all their eggs in one basket to be your unconditional support. A partner who does not try to invigorate you or inspire you is unsupportive.

8. They vanish when you need them 

If you are going through a mill, you will never find them with you. They always bail out on you when you need them the most, and even when you express your concerns to them, they make up lame excuses and put the blame on you for doubting their sincerity. You are left alone in your life by them. 

9. Their Selfishness is conspicuous

Your partner’s self-centeredness is strikingly visible, but you are turning a blind eye to it. They want their ego to be watered enough and are always looking for attention and praise. They do not return love, attention, and care to you.

What does it mean to have a reliable, loving, and supporting partner?

Healthy relationships that are worth keeping and trying for are an outcome of a melange of desideratums. There are 3 C’s of a strong relationship: Compromise, commitment, and communication. If either of you lacks in any of the departments, there would be a disparity. 

Just like a mainsail is essential for a ship to voyage in the sea, a reliable and supporting partner is essential for a successful and worthwhile relationship. If you have been open to your partner about their unsupportive nature, but they shun your feelings and refuse to make an effort to improve themselves, they are not worth your love and effort. 

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Sophie Simons

Sophie Simons

Sophie Simons is a leading psychologist with a passion for enriching relationships. Through empathetic counseling and insightful guidance, she empowers couples and individuals to foster deeper connections, resolve conflicts, and create lasting harmony. Sophie's expertise in relationship advice has touched countless lives, making her a trusted source for building fulfilling partnerships.

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